sometimes i do something and then i cant get it off my mind.
distinguished scholars day round 2 was yesterday. besides the non-avoidable hectic moments, everything went fairly smooth.
that was until i started crying in front of all the admissions counselors and a slew of presidential ambassadors. something had come up that i felt responsible for, and i felt terrible. and i cried.
i composed myself, but it was too late. the damage had been done. then i just got extremely embarrassed. i could have and should have handled that issue in a different way, but i didn't. and i'm embarrassed. i'm over what happened. it wasn't all my fault (even though it felt like it at the time). i haven't ruined my presidential ambassador career, i haven't lost my job in the welcome center. they will have probably forgotten about it by monday. i wasn't even stressed, i wasn't overwhelmed, i just felt bad that we had made a mistake.
but the embarrassment of crying in front of those people...that will take me a little while to get over.
i'd like to say i'm a pretty positive person. i don't get upset that often or even cry that often. actually, i think that was the first time i have really cried all semester.
i also know that i don't like crying in front of people. i hate being the person that everyone feels bad for, that gets asked "is everything ok?" or when people try to be nice but you just want to forget about the whole thing: "bailey you are amazing, you did such a great job, let me know if you need anything" etc. can anyone relate to this?
yeah...i just don't like that kind of attention. and not to say that i am un-grateful for the support. but sometimes i'm more appreciative of just a: "it's okay. buck up. you'll be fine. get over it, because we all will too."
and they will. and i have.
distinguished scholars day round 2 was yesterday. besides the non-avoidable hectic moments, everything went fairly smooth.
that was until i started crying in front of all the admissions counselors and a slew of presidential ambassadors. something had come up that i felt responsible for, and i felt terrible. and i cried.
i composed myself, but it was too late. the damage had been done. then i just got extremely embarrassed. i could have and should have handled that issue in a different way, but i didn't. and i'm embarrassed. i'm over what happened. it wasn't all my fault (even though it felt like it at the time). i haven't ruined my presidential ambassador career, i haven't lost my job in the welcome center. they will have probably forgotten about it by monday. i wasn't even stressed, i wasn't overwhelmed, i just felt bad that we had made a mistake.
but the embarrassment of crying in front of those people...that will take me a little while to get over.
i'd like to say i'm a pretty positive person. i don't get upset that often or even cry that often. actually, i think that was the first time i have really cried all semester.
i also know that i don't like crying in front of people. i hate being the person that everyone feels bad for, that gets asked "is everything ok?" or when people try to be nice but you just want to forget about the whole thing: "bailey you are amazing, you did such a great job, let me know if you need anything" etc. can anyone relate to this?
yeah...i just don't like that kind of attention. and not to say that i am un-grateful for the support. but sometimes i'm more appreciative of just a: "it's okay. buck up. you'll be fine. get over it, because we all will too."
and they will. and i have.
1 comment:
:-)
Makes everybody 'rethink'
That's good.
Post a Comment